Oh Baby!
by Acantha Rayne Oak-Moon
Summary: After a year of nursing Severus back to health, another year of dating him and three years in Australia after their break up, Hermione is coming home. It's not Severus, however, who it most excited to see her. Is it? (100 Title Challenge; #60)
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hello my lovelies. Now, I know I have been away forever and I really should be updating other things but this adorable little viper popped into my head and I couldn't resist. He demanded I stroke him and pet him and spoil him with my time and devotion so that is exactly what I did.**

**As per the rules set up by me and my Coven for this account, a member of the Coven has already been mentioned in this first chapter – the lovely Vine of the Coven will be henceforth in this fic known as Vinia DeVane. I can promise that no Potions Master will come to any harm in the making of this tale and lastly that the title of the fic will be in an upcoming chapter as a reaction to the thought that originally made me want to write this.**

**Without further ado, I shall leave you to enjoy. Please review. Reviews make me happy.**

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Chapter 1 

Lucius Malfoy sat at the mahogany desk in his study sifting through the mail that had been delivered twenty minutes earlier – first via owl, then by elf to his awaiting inbox. Three wedding invitations: The first for the bonding ceremony of his ex-wife to none other than Harry Potter – that had been an interesting turn of events after his divorce four years ago. The second invitation was to attend the nuptials of his own son to some nymph-nation princess; Vinia DeVane was the daughter of the dryadic royal family and had captured Draco's attention last year during an ingredients collection expedition the boy had taken with Severus to the States.

The last invitation was unexpected, although it probably shouldn't have been – Sirius Black and Remus Lupin were to marry Lavender Brown in an archaic triad ceremony, the likes of which hadn't been seen since the time of the Hogwarts Founders. After the girl had barely survived the savage attack of Fenrir Greyback, Lupin had helped her through her first few transformations and she helped with raising his pup - Tonks not having survived the war. A year later, 'The Veil' at the Ministry had spit Black out like a worn piece of Drubble's best blowing gum and the three of them had come to some cosy little arrangement within a single moon cycle. Apparently, they were now making it official.

What surprised him most though was still the invitation he had garnered from Potter. It felt a little strange, even after so many years, to have many members of the Order of the Phoenix now be counted as friends. The first to break with tradition had been Severus; after recovering from the snake attack, with Hermione Granger insisting on playing nursemaid for a year, the git had dated her… for almost another year. The awkwardness about who was on which side during the war seemed to have been ignored or forgotten with a few choice comments from each of them in that time. Handy!

It was a shame really, that they had had to part ways when she got a job offer at the Australian Ministry after her parents had chosen to stay 'down under' _and finally forgive her for the Obliviation_. They'd been good together; she brought Severus out of his permanent state of 'I don't give a shit' and he calmed down her constant verbal need for approval every time he'd kissed her. Of course, it didn't hurt for Lucius that she was easy on the eyes and forgave him completely with that wide open heart of hers… and beautiful compassionate eyes. After several therapeutic trips to the Manor to face the demons that the drawing room held for her, Severus had brought her to Sunday lunch every other week.

She wrote about once a month; stunningly long letters about learning Aboriginal languages and studying native Australian magics; how she had taken up surfing, scuba diving and swimming to stay fit; Lucius had no idea what some of these activities were but after a chat with Severus had determined the water sports seemed rather dangerous, even if imagining the young muggleborn in a bathing suit did manage to tighten his underwear to extreme levels of discomfort.

It had only been a week since Hermione had last written so when he saw _'Mr. Lucius A. Malfoy' _in her instantly recognisable handwriting on the last envelope in his inbox, his heart rate picked up dramatically. There was a strange fear prickling within that it was another wedding invitation, that she'd met some beach bum who called everyone 'dude' and 'dudette' and lived in shorts. He opened the letter and released the breath he hadn't realised he was holding; relief flooded his whole body at the realisation that it was not a wedding invitation and left him breathless; shocked at his over-reaction to an _envelope_.

_She's Severus's ex, for Merlin's sake, pull yourself together. _He thought to himself as he took in her words…

_Dear Lucius,_

_I know this is much earlier than I usually write but I was so excited, I had to tell you as soon as it was all decided. I'm coming home. For good. Remember when I told you about three months ago that I got stung by a jellyfish? Well, three days ago, Dad got bit by a spider and as you know, the spiders here are rather well, like an Avada with a mind of its own. He's going to be ok but it made mum and dad realise how much they miss home, where the only dangerous thing they have to deal with these days is Muggle government. And Severus… according to my Mum. She still hasn't forgiven him for not following me to Australia. I've told her time and time again that he'd burn or melt in this much sun but she won't listen._

_So, I'm coming home on Friday. The reason I'm writing, other than to obviously let you know about my exciting return to England, is that I was hoping I could impose upon you to help me out with somewhere to live and a job. I couldn't bear working at the Ministry at home after going through all the post-war trials – especially yours and Severus's. I was thinking maybe you mind need a PA…? Is that a thing in the Wizarding World? I've never heard the term used by wizards but I assume a 'personal assistant' would be useful to you if you don't have one. You know how organised and knowledgeable I am. _

_As for somewhere to live, I'm just too old to still be living with my parents and they'll want space to raise my little brother. Sometimes I still can't believe that I have a brother. I wonder if he'll be magical. I know I've asked you this before but it five too young to display magic?_

_I'm hoping for just a small flat. I contacted the Ministry and attached the fireplace here to the floo so we can get back without the cost of international flights. Mum and Dad are nervous about the floo but they agreed to save money. The reason I told you that though is because by the time you receive this letter it will probably be Thursday and a return owl wouldn't reach me before we leave. Minerva said I can stay at Hogwarts until I find somewhere and of course my parents are going to go home to their house with Ryan who will have my old room. I'm so glad I didn't sell it when I thought we wouldn't be able to return their memories. I'll always be so grateful that you were able to do that for them… and for me. _

_Well, I think I've rambled on long enough. I'll be at Hogwarts Friday from midday. Australia, as you know is eleven hours ahead. We're flooing directly to Hogwarts for 'breakfast' at about 8am before I apparate them home and help them get settled. Minerva has been wonderful. She even offered me an apprenticeship with her for Transfiguration but after the last battle, I don't think I could live at the castle full-time. Too many memories._

_I really hope you can help. Love always_

_H x_

Lucius read the letter twice, his smile growing wider. The only people in the world who could give him this big of a smile were Hermione, Severus and Draco. Everyone else got a smirk; even his ex-wife whom he was on friendly terms with couldn't do it. She wasn't a Malfoy anymore. She didn't get to see the beauty of a genuine smile so radiant, the first rays of sunshine on the coldest morning couldn't compare. That was something Hermione had said to him once. A facsimile he was rather fond and proud of.

Agreeing with the young woman that an owl response would take too long, he conjured his patronus – his memory, the first time she had described his smile in such a way – a large silvery-blue peacock danced from his wand and preened for a moment before waiting for instruction. He had not so pleasant thoughts about the form of inner animal nature but again, Hermione's opinions on that too were unfailingly kind, if a little cheeky.

'_Well you are a bit of a poser, Lucius; you can hardly deny the vanity with the amount of mirrors around here but think about it another way. When those tail feathers spread out in all their glory, a peacock is magnificent and is worthy of the ooo's and oh's it attracts.'_

'_So what you're saying is… "I'm sexy and I know it?"' he had asked with a smirk, one eyebrow raised in challenge. 'But you are also saying that you know it too.' He'd finished smugly, winking at her._

_Severus had scowled at that._

'_Of course you are, Lucius.' She'd started to reply making him feel smugger than ever; it was only when she continued that his beaming smile turned sour for a moment, 'but nowhere near as sexy as my dark and brooding Potions Master, here.'_

_Severus had never looked more self-satisfied in his life as when the little witch moved to sit in his lap then, wrapping her possessive arms around his neck and pulling him toward her lips for a ten-minute lip lock._

Lucius chuckled as he remembered that moment. So few people could tame Severus's acerbic tongue; Hermione did so by keeping it busy with her own. She deserved the moniker 'Brightest Witch of her Age'.

Still snickering, he turned his attention to his glowing peacock patronus:

"Hermione, I'm so pleased you're coming home. I will, of course arrange employment for you with Malfoy Industries, if that is what you wish. You know I have coveted your talents for my company for a long time. I understand you wanting to stay at the castle for a day or two to catch up with the Headmistress and the other faculty and I will be happy to lease any of my empty properties to you indefinitely but until you find something you like, I insist you stay at the Manor. As you know, there is more than enough room and it will be nice to have more company and conversation than the elves can provide. I'll see you at Hogwarts for lunch tomorrow. Dobby's Clam Chowder always was second to none. Does Severus know you're coming home?"

With a flick, the peacock flew through the nearest wall and off to Australia. Sweet Salazar, how he missed that witch. In the five years since the war, between her caring for Severus whilst in a weakened state, followed by them dating for a year and the intervening years of letters, Lucius had found himself half in love with his best friend's ex. Oh yes, he missed the witch and as excited as he was to see her tomorrow, he wondered how he might conceal the inevitable erection that would make an appearance, possibly within seconds of seeing her.

…

**A/N: Well there we have it. The first chapter is complete. This is not going to be a long fic so I'm skipping Hermione arriving back, taking her parent's home, staying at Hogwarts. Harry and Ron probably popped in to say hi if you really want to know something of the following hours. I'll be picking up as Lucius comes to get her. I've never done a Lucius POV and I'm rather enjoying myself with it. Don't forget to review.**

**Love and Blessings**

**Moon x**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I have chapter 2 all bright and shiny and hot off the presses for you of this delicious little Lumione; still trying to decide whether to edge it into a Luminous (Lucius/Hermione/Severus triad thing) as at the moment it can go either way. Although challenge rules indicate that I have to give Severus a happy ending. Your thoughts will be welcome on this.**

**Also, a second Coven member has slithered her way into this little ficlet… the beautiful Snow agreed to take on the role of Salacia Murcas and even picked her own character name. I hope you like how I portrayed you, Snow.**

**Well, on with show… enjoy… and please review…**

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Chapter 2

It had only taken half an hour after sending his patronus yesterday for Hermione to respond. Her excitement was clear in the tone of her voice and she didn't even hide it in her words.

"_Lucius, thank you so much for helping me. I knew I could rely on you. Look how far we've come in five years. I couldn't be prouder than to say I've tamed a Malfoy into being a wonderful and generous human being." Her tinkling laugh echoed from the otter before her voice continued, "Can't wait to see you. It's been such a long time and I'm so happy that I'll be back in the country for all the weddings that are coming up. I really can't wait to meet Vinia. What's she like? In answer to your question about Severus, I did write to him to let him know I'd be returning but I haven't heard back. Our correspondence is still rather lax. I'll see you tomorrow… well, later today for me. Mwah."_

"Tamed a Malfoy indeed." Lucius scoffed as he remembered her teasing words whilst readying himself for the floo to Hogwarts. On reflection though, he had to admit, surveying the stonewash denim that covered his legs and the double breasted, navy sports coat over his dove grey dress shirt, she had had a very obvious effect on, at the very least, his fashion sense. Given how excited he was to see her too, she had certainly impacted on his feelings regarding witches who were muggleborn – he even funded two muggleborn scholarships to Hogwarts now – The Granger Scholarship funded two muggleborn students every year; The KIA Scholarship (co-funded by Severus) supported any student who had a love of learning but very little means; the name had made her scowl when she realised that KIA stood for 'know-it-all' but she took it with good humour when she realised they had not capped the amount of students this would help – if one hundred students met the requirements every year, then that is how many scholarships would be provided. Of course, she still hexed both of their distinctive manes Gryffindor red – for a week - for the name of the fund.

Deeming himself ready to see the little witch, he made his way to the fireplace to floo to Hogwarts. It really had been too long, despite having seen her briefly at Christmas when she'd portkeyed over for three days with gifts. He was wearing the silver snake pin she'd given him on his collar, as well as sporting the matching cufflinks which were a gift from the previous year. He wondered if she'd notice.

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"… but he let me go, Minerva. They both did. I was prepared to stay; to choose Severus over the job, to only go to Australia for visits but he pushed me to take it. And Lucius did too. I…" Hermione's speech was interrupted with wracking sobs and the comforting words of the Headmistress. Lucius continued to listen from his position near the entrance to the staff room. It was summer so there were no students around and apparently he was to be privy to something he always thought he knew well – Hermione's emotions.

"What's that about Lucius, dear? I thought you and Severus were…? Were you seeing both of them?" The thick Scottish accent asked, obviously piqued with curiosity.

"No… _hiccup_… nothing like that. Although Severus and I once talked about maybe… never mind. I did have feelings like that for Lucius; I still do if I'm honest and Severus even understood; albeit begrudgingly and in his usual way of 'snipe now, understand later', but after our history, I felt like it would be a lost cause. In all honesty, it felt like quite the miracle just getting Lucius's friendship. _'Sniff'_ I wanted more and Severus agreed to try but every time I pictured Lucius touching me, all I could see was a sneer on his face and a look of disgust. You know I've forgiven him completely but these things are… well, they're ingrained in how I grew up."

"I don't think he would ever expect you to forget what he was. I sincerely doubt he could see a world back then in which _you, _of all people, would keep him from Azkaban. Not to mention how you inspired the scholarship programs from Malfoy Industries, helped him renovate the Manor and in so many other little ways forgave him his previous alliances and transgressions. Hermione, sweetheart, you spent time with him when the rest of the magical world shunned him. You did all those things and with all likelihood, singlehandedly restored the Malfoy name to some of its former glory. Your compassion knows no bounds, Hermione. He knows that and I am sure he is thankful for it. Do you really believe that a romance would end in sneering and disgust? Perhaps, you should talk to him. Let him know how you feel."

"I can't. I don't want him to know. I will not have him feel any worse about his past just because I have a moment of emotional weakness. I can keep it under wraps like I always have; it was just the thought of seeing him after so long that set me off. I can handle this. He's never had to know before and there is no possible way he would reciprocate my feelings even if he did know. I've managed to keep the depths of these feelings from even Severus and you know how he is with his legilimency – nothing is sacred."

As the two women giggled a little over Hermione's apt description of his best friend's skill with mind reading, Lucius stepped away from the slightly ajar door in shock. Hermione had feelings for him. Romantic ones. But she still feared him? Feared his prejudice was more accurate. She had never feared _him_, per se, not really. The girl could hold her own, be it in a duel, an argument or any other confrontation he'd witnessed.

He had shown up early to meet with her for lunch, unable to contain his anticipation at seeing her bouncing, chestnut curls, beaming smile and forgiving eyes. With the knowledge that he still had time until he was expected, he set off for the Black Lake. It had been years since he'd stared into the murky depths just to think. The last time, in fact, had been his own seventh year at the school when it had been made apparent that he would be joining the Death Eaters when he left.

He sat at the water's edge, his wand lazily swirling the waterlilies on the surface, opening and closing the petals of the sparse flowers that sat on the many thick green pads. He was lost in thoughts of Hermione and all he'd heard from the Gryffindor women when a soft, wailing noise broke him from his thoughts.

He knew that wail. It had been almost thirty years since he'd last heard it but he could never forget. Without even lifting his head to the source, Lucius flicked his wand toward the water, transforming the mermaid's gills into a more human system of drawing breath and allowing her a speaking voice that wouldn't give him a migraine.

"Lucius…" came a strange, ethereal voice. It still gave him shivers.

"Princess." He said, a little bitterly but still not raising his head.

"Don't take that tone with me, Lucius." The mermaid responded firmly. He could hear the affection behind her words even if she didn't mean to show it.

His shoulders slumped and he sighed.

"Salacia… how are you?"

"Better than you by the looks of it. I felt the sadness of your aura from thirty feet down. What has you as depressed as the thought of taking the dark mark? Surely, that despot has not returned again? He really must learn to stay dead."

"No, Salacia; he is not returned, _again_; thank Merlin. The Dark Lord is pushing up daisies next to his mother. Probably black ones. I find myself in a rather dark mood for other reasons and need to not be. What was it you used to tell me? Something about a fish and… trees?"

The mermaids strange, echo-like, hollow laugh made the blond man shiver on the muddy bank and he realised that this was something else Hermione had changed about him – not caring about getting his clothes dirty. He wondered momentarily if it was because they were muggle clothes and realised, to his own astonishment, that it was not.

"Ah, yes… 'Everyone is a genius but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will spend its whole life believing itself to be stupid.'" The mermaid recited the quote as she'd heard Albus Dumbledore quote it to Gellert Grindelwald. The memory was decades old, from a time when the old Headmaster had been attempting to sway his friend away from muggle-hating opinions. Not that it had worked. She wondered if she'd got the phrasing right, something seemed off about it.

"That's the one. I feel rather stupid at the moment. Salacia, she wanted to stay; she wanted me. She had Severus - the spy who saved her and her friends over and over again; the man who matched her in intelligence and wit; yet, she would have accepted me. After everything."

"Of course…" the mermaid sighed, "This is about a witch. I should've known. Nothing can tie a man in knots and make him doubt himself more so than a woman."

"Do not mock me about this, Sally. It's jarring to know that after all she went through at the hands of…"

"You said she had Severus Snape. The only witch I know of is…"

"Hermione Granger."

"Well… then I can see your dilemma. Even in the depths we hear gossip from the surface and I can certainly understand what has you so knotted up. That witch is…"

"Perfection."

"You've got it bad, haven't you?" she chuckled.

"I overheard her talking to Minerva McGonagall. She said she would have stayed if Severus or I had asked her to; that she wanted us to. How could we have been so blind not to see it? That she was waiting. Her hesitance to leave wasn't nerves over her new job or moving to another country. It was waiting for us to ask her to stay. I owe her my life, Sally. I'd watched her like a hawk for months before she went looking for real doubts in her and there was nothing; Severus is probably the best legilimens in the world for Merlin's sake and even he didn't see it."

"Perhaps he did."

Lucius's eyes snapped up to Salacia's for the first time since he arrived.

"What do you know?" he asked sharply.

"You are not the only wizard to sit on these banks and pour his heart out. And just as I keep your confidences, I shall keep those of the others."

"Sally…" he warned, "I need your help."

"You are _not_ asking for a Mermaid's Favour?" She asked incredulously before lowering her voice to a warning whisper. "Lucius, you know the price of such magic. I am bound by the laws of my people; I cannot protect you from the consequences."

"I won't need protection. I assure you my heart is pure in this request. I only wish to save her the heartache of feeling rejected, unwanted, _again,_ by the same men who once scorned her for nothing more than being herself – her blood and her thirst for knowledge are the reasons she was bullied by grown men as a child. Sally, please… I owe her this."

"I don't approve of this Lucius but if it is what you need then I will grant your favour and send you back…"

He breathed a sigh of relief.

"Oh Salacia, thank you."

"Under two conditions…"

"Anything." He sounded desperate.

"Firstly, you spend the next week in her company before I open the portal. Time apart can obscure memories of what the heart truly wants. The old adage is true; absence does make the heart grow fonder… the reason for that is that time helps you forget the negatives. _If_ you still wish to make this journey at the end of that time and _only_ if… my second condition will come into play. You must tell her of your plans and why you are going ahead with them. If she agrees to your plan _and_ your reasoning then I will send you back to the night before she left."

Lucius was well known for his scowl. It usually wasn't quite as fierce as Severus's but in that moment, Salacia Murcas, daughter of the Mer-Chieftainess felt that Lucius Malfoy's glowering eyes could've melted the scales from her body.

"Those are my terms, Lucius. And this… is my promise to fulfil our bargain."

She took a pearl from the head-dress she wore that announced her status and threw it at his chest, where it absorbed directly into his robes, then his body.

He nodded. He was impressed with her tactics – very Slytherin – even if he didn't particularly like her terms.

"I shall know whether the terms have been met. You have become more impressive under her influence than at any other time in your life. Do not revert to who you were Lucius. Do not disappoint me."

"I hate it when you play princess."

"I learn from the best." She teased with a smirk. "Nice doing business with you."

"Yes… well, I should head up the castle. She's expecting me." He said quickly, suddenly wanting this reunion to be over. Turning away, he started up the hill and back toward the castle, flicking his wand at his clothes to vanish the muddy patches.

"Malfoy…" Salacia furiously called after him, "Give me my gills back, you bastard."

He chuckled, flicking his wand behind him.

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**A/N: Well, Lucius has some thinking to do, maybe some planning or Slytherin plotting. Next up, Hermione moves into the Manor and the title of this fic comes into play. Can't wait for that… will write it Tuesday hopefully. One paragraph is done lol.**

**Snow, thank you so much for the inspiration of Salacia; she was so much fun to write and anyone being strict with Lucius gives me the shivers from the excitement of it.**

**Please let me know what you all think below. The review box is there to give authors feedback and I love feedback.**

**Love and Blessings**

**Moon Out x**


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